Dabbler

While I'm my 50's I'm taking back the stuff that brought me joy in my first decades of life. I'm dabbling: improv, stand-up, mahjong, might even start sewing again.

I'm leaning in to activities that require a sound body. The slow unravel has begun and I need more stretching, more supplements, and more sleep than ever. Gotta exploit this body while she's still functional!

With this as a guide star, I decided to be a ski instructor this year. I figured I had all the necessary skills as a life-long skier. I learned how to ski when I was three-years-old, so it's hardwired - like bringing a cup to my lips or driving a car - the circumstances and the tools might change, but my body knows what to do and how to adapt to new terrain.

Teaching skiing, and learning mechanics of teaching skiing, was a whole new ballgame. It broke my brain a little bit putting together the steps from boot work to putting on a ski to navigating the first sensation of sliding on snow. It illuminated my crappy habits I'd developed over the years, that's for sure. So humbling, yet another small ego death in my 50's. They just keep piling on.

The best part of ski instructing was being around people who also love skiing. I trained with a multi-generational group, kids in high school, retirees, and everyone in between, all of us there because we love to ski and want to pass that love on. The free season pass was definitely a perk, but the general fully-stoked vibe was the biggest perk of all - we were outdoors, on skis, with ski people, and getting paid for it. Total bliss, even on the shitty days.

Showing up for a day of instructing is not easy. I left home just before 6am to get to the mountain before the parking lot filled up at 7:30. At 8:30 we'd meet in all our gear for the daily update and to warm up, then it was out to the corrals to wait for our students. We'd teach til lunch, decompress, then head back for afternoon lessons. The day ended at 3pm and that's when the full body/brain exhaustion hit. Skiing all day is one thing, but that's not ski instructing. I ran up and down hills over and over, did constant lat-pulls hefting 40-pound kids off the snow by their vests, kneeled down stood up kneeled down stood up kneeled down ... rinse and repeat all day in ski boots.

Sometimes my students were kids as young as three, sometimes I had adults, sometimes it was a group as large as 6 people, and a few glorious times it was just one student. Some had a little experience, but more often than not these were absolute beginners.

These folks were so green a few hadn't even seen snow before. Many had never held skis and didn't know the tip from the tail. More than once I had students walk up to me carrying their skis upside down, tips flexing in the snow. I had two hours to get them from standing like robots in their rented ski boots to fearlessly navigating the magic carpet (like a rope tow, but better) and sliding down the bunny slope, all while maintaining control on two sticks attached to their feet.

I am proud to say that each of my students left my lesson a skier. I hope that they felt encouraged enough to try skiing again. There are so many barriers in the sport: the gear is expensive, the tickets are expensive, the resorts are often far away, and it's definitely, historically, a white space. Meadows, where I taught, is deeply committed to breaking down those barriers and creating accessibility for folks. It felt good to work for a company that's aware of its systemic obstacles.

I had a good run, despite the alarmingly low snowpack this year, the resort's early closure, and precious-few personal free ride days. I walked away feeling a little more stable in this completely destabilized time of my life, I reclaimed some competence and joy. I was reminded of who I've always been and introduced to a new facet of whom I'm becoming.

I'm going to keep telling myself what I'd tell my students - it was my first piece of advice I'd give when I met them and my mantra throughout the lesson: LOOK WHERE YOU'RE GOING! KEEP YOUR EYES UP! YOUR BODY KNOWS WHAT TO DO!